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Photograph any street, find out when it was built

you can date a row of houses from the pavement if you know what to look at — window proportions, brick bond, where the drainpipes run, roof pitch. i tried it on my own street expecting nonsense and got 1928–1935, which is right. now i can't walk anywhere without doing it.

Which of your friends took this photo? It can tell.

hand it a group photo and let it work backwards: who's missing, how high the camera was held, who's centred, who got cropped. it named the photographer three for three across a stack of old sailing pictures, including one i'd have sworn was on a timer. the reasoning is the good part.

Show it your hands. It'll guess what you do all day.

twenty-odd years under cars leaves a record. i photographed both hands, palms up then palms down, and it read the callus map, the nail beds, the one knuckle that sits wrong. came back with 'works with tools, right-hand dominant, and something happened to that finger.' something did. 1998.