You, dunking. Finally documented.

IT department verdict: the last person who saw me dunk was nobody, because it has never happened. And yet here is the photograph — same court, same chain net, same worn sneakers I actually play in — me a full foot above the rim, ball crushed in one hand, absolutely no explanation offered. The physics are real, the light is real, only the vertical is fiction. Sent it with no caption. Tweak: 'make it a windmill' when the first one stops working.